Tuesday, May 5, 2009

The time we have left...

I was over at Brigid's today, reading her most recent post: Skeleton Coasts

Prior to that, a friend and I had a conversation that touched on the subject of time and relationships. Brigid's post and my conversation have me thinking about mortality, and the way none of us really know what time we may have left. As J. Shirley wrote in comments at Brigid's place, we all have the same amount of time, an instant. It's true. In the grand scheme of things, we each are on this earth for only a brief moment.

I learned long ago to suffer fools only reluctantly, and to guard my time jealously from those who would waste it. Far too often, we allow people to steal pieces of our lives, out of politeness, or obligation. I try not to, for I feel my mortality creeping up upon me. Though only 33, we live in uncertain times, and after all, even were I 20, I could be run down in the street later today. Everyone has known someone who is a bore or a pain to speak to. How often do we allow these people to use our precious time?

How often do we willingly trade away moments in pursuits we do not enjoy? How much time spent chasing a paycheck, often at the expense of those relationships or interests we enjoy most? Too often by far, in my experience. Some time ago, I made the choice that I would move toward a life without regrets. I can not change what has passed, but the future is mine to determine.

Ultimately, I choose to pursue those interests which both entertain me, and increase my chances at a life of increased freedom. I seek out those people whose company I enjoy, and I shun those people I have no use for. There is no guarantee of what lies beyond Death's pale curtain, even for those with unwavering faith. I live my life as though these few fleeting years are all I will have.

Laugh without restraint, Love with abandon, seek joy where you can find it.

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